Life is filled with chairs being pulled out from under us. A new client shared that for the first time in her life, with over 20 years of work experience under her belt and great performance reviews and references from previous employers, she was laid off after being at a new job for six months. She’d left a good job for what seemed like a promising opportunity only to be let go when the company hit a rough patch and applied the “Last In, First Out” (LIFO) policy in the redundancy process.
In this day and age, everyone is at risk to be “fired,” “terminated,” “let go,” or “made redundant.” Yes, we’ve all run into a bad, lazy employee who is incapable of doing a hard day’s work. However, the vast majority of job losses have nothing to do with job performance and everything to do with the bottom line. When employers experience financial hardship the standard mode of operation is to lay off employees. So if you’ve lost your job, it’s likely due to economic and political forces at work.
Throughout my career I served as the messenger delivering the bad news that “your position has been eliminated” or “your services are no longer required.” It is the most difficult job responsibility of Human Resources professionals. It can’t be said enough – it is painful, and it sucks. In the words of Socrates: “no one likes the messenger who brings bad news.” And as hard as you try to get it done with sensitivity and tact, there’s no way to make it better or right. You are causing great harm to another person, often someone you care about. And you sure do understand the emotional and financial implications of a job loss. Although it is not your personal decision, you are in a leadership role; you are a part of the decision.
It is a rude awakening when we are thrown off course. It’s painful to feel we’ve done everything right and get the “wrong” outcomes despite of our best efforts. For those facing a similar situation and looking for advice, I am sorry to say I don’t have all the answers. But I have seen many people successfully manage the stress of losing a job to be able to seize the opportunity to explore new careers, find better jobs, and move on to greater things. The key is to be able to mourn the loss of the job, but quickly move on from self-pity to self-discovery. Just because you were thrown a curve ball and had the wind knocked out of you, it doesn’t mean you are doomed to fail. This is a temporary setback. You never know what’s around the corner. What looks like a great loss could be a blessing in disguise. You just don’t know it, yet.
Consider the Taoist story of the old farmer. The old farmer had worked diligently in the fields for many years when his horse disappeared. All his neighbors came to express their sympathy at the unfortunate turn of events. But the farmer remained calm saying “whether this is good or bad remains to be seen.” Within a few days the horse returned home with two wild horses. The neighbors came back offering their congratulations on his good luck. And again the farmer remained calm saying “whether this is good or bad remains to be seen.” The farmer’s son decided to tame the wild horses, and in an attempt to mount the animals, he was thrown off and broke his leg. The neighbors bearing small gifts and good wishes for a speedy recovery cluck their tongues at the terrible misfortune. But the farmer held firm maintaining that “whether this is good or bad remains to be seen.” Within a week, the country went to war, and military officials came to the village taking all the young men into the army. The farmer’s son was not drafted since his leg was broken. To his neighbors, who were worried about their sons, the farmer’s words of encouragement were “whether this is good or bad remains to be seen.”
Our most significant growth often comes following a serious setback. They key is to turn a negative event into a positive opportunity to start over fresh.
Here’s how you move forward:
Process the job loss: manage the whirlwind of emotions that accompany a job loss; the anger, sadness, fear, etc. Accept your feelings. Take a couple of days to wallow in self-pity: wear your PJ's all day long, eat ice cream out of the container, indulge in comfort food, watch your favorite movies, play sad songs, and do whatever you want. But then get up and get on with your life. Focus on what’s next for you.
Re-engage: make sure you take full advantage of your new-found free time to do all the things you haven’t had time for before – work out, eat healthy, catch up on your reading and to-do list. And spend a significant part of your days doing things that will make you more appealing to prospective employers; for example, join professional development groups, find volunteer opportunities, reach out and connect with your network.
Get perspective: look within yourself and ask yourself the tough questions:
What do I need to get through this?
What can I learn from what happened?
What will get me what I want?
Answering these questions and having clarity must be a first step before pursuing new opportunities. Outline past accomplishments and articulate your compelling story to rebrand yourself in the job market.
Persevere: don’t panic when you send a hundred applications and receive only a few calls back for interviews. It’s a numbers game. Create your bucket list of companies you want to work for and network your way into a new job. Creating a target list of desirable companies and working a plan to build relationships with them is the smartest way to land a job with a company you admire and respect.
Becoming unemployed is a huge kick in the gut. But don’t let a job status, whether employed or unemployed, define you. Success in life is defined by how we respond to life’s challenges. Stay positive and confident. Positive attitude will help you move forward faster and more constructively.
