In my line of work, I frequently hear my clients exclaim “I’m so lost.” Nowadays, more than ever, given the many curveballs 2020 has thrown at us. Being an Executive & Career Coach is a privileged job because it is the kind of work that’s personal, meaningful, and fulfilling. I love being there in the trenches guiding people through career challenges; times of discouragement and stressful experience of loss and change. There is a positive aspect to feeling lost. It can serve as a catalyst for positive change. It can become the driving force that helps you spot hidden opportunities. That requires a willingness to experiment, to ask the important questions to understand & tackle the right issues of what is not working and where we get stuck. When we reframe “being lost” into “going exploring” we can discover new insights and paths we may have never discovered otherwise.
One of the things I have been struggling with in the Pandemic is the loss of my normal routine. Planning and scheduling ahead is my blueprint for how to create and maintain a healthy work-life balance. I have tried to welcome spontaneity into my life, but if I am completely honest, I am a planner. My motto is “be prepared” – for both the near and distance future. I plan out everything, including “spontaneous” excursions and adventures. I am at my best when I know what to expect for the day, the week, and the month. Booking things months in advance gives me something to look forward to. The anticipation brings me joy well before a trip, or an event, actually happens. When I have a plan, it feels easier to navigate the way forward, to stay the course. But now, it feels futile to try and plan ahead, to try and gain control of the uncontrollable. How do you keep moving forward when your life has been turned upside down?
My strategy has been to get grounded in the now and focus on all that I can do to stay optimistic and be a positive voice in these scary times. I am free to choose how I give meaning to each day. And yet, some days it’s easy to get lost – in the physical, or metaphorical forest. I am directionally challenged. Pre GPS and Google Maps, I used to get lost all the time; taking a wrong turn, or going in the incorrect direction. But with modern technology, I can find my way anywhere with relative ease. After years of confidently navigating trails, urban walking routes, steep unkempt trails, and the metaphorical life’s path, I got lost on a hike last weekend. For real. As scary as that experience was, it reminded me how empowering it can be to figure out ways to power through when you are lost without a phone, or any navigation apps. Making my way back to the trailhead awakened my sense of self-reliance, resourcefulness, and resilience. In a world that’s characterized by extreme uncertainty, and a virus that can throw routines topsy-turvy, wreaking havoc on planning ahead and plans, we can still find and re-connect with our inner power.
Being lost and experiencing losses can lead to deeper self-awareness and self-reliance. Sometimes a wrong turn, or an unexpected path, even if they don’t get you to the right place, can be an experience worth having, leading to massive learning and growth. And as we try to figure out the way forward, we may as well enjoy the scenery as we go. I also learned that I don’t always have to be self-reliant. We can lean on others – people close to us, or kind strangers on the trail. If you are feeling lost nowadays, or have experienced a loss, such as the loss of a job, normal routine, canceled plans, and lost dreams, remind yourself that feeling lost is part of the process of reconnecting with your true self – finding out what is important to you.
The premise is that challenges ignite change. Rising up to a challenge is the driving force behind positive outcomes. As hard as change can be, it gives us the opportunity to grow and get to the other side stronger. During the Pandemic I’ve heard many people refer to hope as an acronym: Hold On Pain Ends. I’d like to offer a more proactive approach to transition from feeling lost and powerless to becoming empowered.
Hone in on what you are feeling. Name your losses (real or perceived.)
Own your power. Take inventory of your strengths & ignite your superpower.
Proactively look for solutions, and create a list of simple acts of moving forward.
Embrace the discomfort & use it as fuel for your new adventure living through uncertainty.
For me, committing to one thing a day to try out gives me a sense of power and accomplishment. And with this simple daily challenge, I have gained an important insight. I used to think that life was beautiful despite the adversity in the world. I have come to believe life is beautiful because of it. I am forever inspired by the magnificent capacity of the human spirit to turn adversity into opportunity.
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