This post is personal, but I believe it is professionally relevant and tied to career success. This week I saw a friend for the first time since the pandemic started. She looked at me and said: “You look so good. You are so lucky.” Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate compliments as much as the next person, and I do recognize giving compliments is a powerful form of connecting to others by noting the things we like about them. But the compliment felt uncomfortable, it was even a bit upsetting, because it doesn’t line up with my experience. There is no luck involved in my appearance, or fitness level. What we see in any given moment in time is not an indication of the process and efforts to get there.
Heads up, it’s going to get really personal. I did gain 20 pounds through the periods of shelter in place in 2020. I worked up regularly, but my husband who pre-pandemic was a road warrior was suddenly home with me 24/7. He is a foodie whose love language is cooking and feeding people. In the pandemic, we’ve developed quite the addiction to The Great British Baking Show. He had always been a great cook but had no patience for baking. As the pandemic dragged on, baking became his therapy and distraction from the new normal of Pandemic Life. So, in addition to preparing healthy home cooked meals, he started making bread and other pastries. For months, our house smelled delicious and welcoming. And the pounds piled on. You see, for me, it takes a lot of effort to maintain a healthy weight.
As a child, my family was an overweight family. And I was the fattest of the fat. Until the age of 11 when I decided to make healthy nutritional and fitness choices. My story is not that of bullying and lack of self-esteem. I was fortunate to have two very loving and supportive parents who emphasized character, personality, and intellect over physical appearance. But I was still determined to beat my tendency towards obesity. I figured out early on that the way to do that was to eat less and exercise more. I have been able to maintain a healthy weight for the most part successfully for four decades with some twists and turns along the way, at times perhaps a bit underweight and at others a bit overweight. In the early months of the pandemic, I gave myself permission to enjoy the special time at home with my husband and indulge in comfort food and baked goods. But then it was time to go back to normal. Losing the extra weight took commitment and effort, and it takes just as much effort to stay at a healthy weight. Thus, “looking good” has nothing to do with good luck and everything to do with effort, a lot of effort.
In life and in our career, we tend to overemphasize luck when people are successful at things like finding a job, getting a promotion, etc. and under-appreciate their hard work to turn opportunity into a success. What we see is just a snapshot of someone’s journey, which in all likelihood included struggles, setbacks, and failures until the moment of triumph we are witnessing presently. Luck really does depend on the choices people make. Yes, random events do happen. However, it is how people cope with and overcome obstacles that makes all the difference when morphing these challenges into opportunities on the road to success. Achievement is rarely about luck and mostly about hard work, determination, persistence, resilience, and perseverance. No goal can be achieved without putting in the work and effort.
To create your own LUCK:
Look for ways to expand your knowledge, update your skills, and grow.
Unlock the opportunities to achieve your goals and fulfill your potential.
Commit to yourself, your goals, and to hard work.
Keep going until you are proud.
And always be asking: “Am I working hard enough?
Whether you think you do or you don't you are probably right….
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