This blog is bittersweet. It is about being proud of how far I have come but also feeling disappointed for not pushing myself further. I am immensely proud of myself for going whitewater rafting, which I find terrifying. Throughout the years, I’ve made it a habit to face my fears and get out of my comfort zone. But I am not much of a risk taker. It may seem like I am always up for an adventure, and it’s true. But I tend to stick to activities that are safe and in no way life threatening. If I am honest, even the Ferris Wheel at the state fair makes me nervous. Just the idea of riding the waves running through rapids was downright terrifying. Still, personal growth is lifelong commitment for me. So, I planned a whitewater rafting trip and showed up. There isn’t really anything life threatening about whitewater rafting, but people do get tossed out of the boat, and everyone gets drenched in freezing cold water. I started really freaking out and was ready to bolt out of there as soon as the guide started going over the safety instructions, describing the different ways I could get injured or die if I fall out. But before I knew it, I was floating down the river towards the first rapid. And I not only survived, but truly enjoyed the experience.
Even though every photograph shows me wearing a look of sheer terror, I loved the experience. I am happy to say we didn’t capsize going through rapids called Triple Threat, Troublemaker, Satan’s Cesspool, Deadman’s Drop, and Hospital Bar. It was intense sitting up on the side of the boat and paddling hard and steady into a rapid. When it got really scary, I found myself ducking, sitting as far down as I could in the boat, waiting for the waves to pass through us. I want to say I am proud that I didn’t fall in, not even once. But I actually feel deeply disappointed in myself for not being able to let go and jump in the water, or even just to be able to face the rapids heads-up instead of crouching down in fear hanging on for dear life. So, this was a bittersweet experience leaving me feeling a mixture of both happy and sad. I showed up, but fear did make me put on the brakes. I was vulnerable and was willing to take some risk. However, these positives were counterbalanced by an unshakeable urge to protect myself. Perhaps the life lesson here is to stop beating myself up for what I was unable to do yet, and embrace the emotional complexity of life.
The truth is that every experience has its own unique mix of emotional flavors. In life, as we face new experiences like starting a new job, relocating to a new place, pivot into a new career, we are likely to feel a wide-range of different emotions simultaneously; excitement, anxiety, hope, and fear. Positive and negative emotions often co-exist. It’s normal to feel all of these emotions because we are complicated beings experiencing complex situations. Success isn’t about completely overcoming the fear, but rather about honoring it and letting it be while still daring to seize the day and the opportunities. It’s about rising above the wave feeling the full range of emotions knowing it’s a process. Today I just hang on. I might fall into the raging waters tomorrow. And maybe one day soon, I will transition from survival mode to thriving mode and will dare swim the rapid.
Is your career in survive or thrive mode? Does your work feel like an exciting ride or an endless grind? Are you white-knuckling it, or finding fulfillment and joy in your work? To transition from surviving to thriving requires letting go of the familiar and comfortable to be willing to jump out of the realm of safety into a brand new, uncharted territory. It’s about choosing to release what no longer serves you and live more courageously. Throughout the career journey, we are faced with decisions. At the core of decision-making is when to release the past and embrace the future; when to let go and stop clinging to old ways to make room for and create the space to attract new opportunities. Whether to hold on or let go is about transformation, an energetic shift from chrysalis to butterfly. It is the process of going from where you have been to a place never been to before. The distance between the two point is scary. It is where all of the hard work and action happen. It is also the most exciting place where many changes happen.
The cocoon is cozy, safe, and calm. It is important to keep things in perspective both during the decision-making and afterwards. It takes constant reminder to self that no matter which choice you make, you are going to be OK. As much as we’d like to control every variable and have assurance that we make the right choice, we inevitably make mistakes. Regert is unproductive. Don’t dwell on what could have been but rather focus your energy on moving forward and trying to make better decisions in the future based on the lessons learned. We go through the process of transition many times in our life and through the career journey. To effectively navigate the process, be willing to enhance the parts of yourself that serve you but change and shade those that get in the way of living your full potential and thriving.
Transforming and Thriving
Is a choice to dare pursue what you really want in life and courageously transform in the process. Be inspired by possibilities, harness hope, and liberate your energy. Discard your fears and self-doubt like smoke into the wind.
Is a lifelong journey. Whether you want to, or not, you are constantly going through new experiences facing new realities. Thus, you have to continue to evolve to keep up with the times and be in the flow.
Is about progress not perfection. Since no one is perfect, you don’t need to be perfect to thrive. When you don’t fall or fail, you don’t take risks, which is the ultimate failure. When you fail, use it as helpful information to keep flowing.
The Jewish holiday of Rosh Hashanah is coming up. It is the beginning of the Jewish year. On the first day of the holiday there is an ancient custom called Tashlikh in which people go to a lake, river, the sea, or a body of water to symbolically throw their sins into the water to start the new year fresh. It is a beautiful ritual that can be applied to casting away and letting go of things that no longer serve us in order to start fresh.
Let’s Breathe and let go.
There is nothing we can do about the wrongs of yesterday.
This very moment is the only one we have, today.
May we have the courage to let go; to
Stop blaming, judging & criticizing
Stop reminiscing & regretting
Stop living in fear.
May we have the courage to grow; to
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