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Gila Gam

Running with Wild Horses: From Fear to Fierce

In the pursuit of my multi-year goal to run a half marathon in all 50 states, I just took WY off the list last weekend. This was a trail race. As an avid hiker, I am no stranger to the great outdoors. Hitting the trail is always full of excitement; mostly because I never hike alone. I always have hiking buddies to share the experience with me – the fun and the challenges. When trail running, on the other hand, I am on my own. There may not be other runners at my pace for miles on end. Thus, I am both excited for the opportunity to be off paved roads and on the trail but also very scared.


The range of emotions that running elicits is massive. As a newbie trail runner, trail running brings out fears and concerns about safety – 3 fears in particular:

  1. Snakes. I love being in nature and hike trails. But, these slithery, potentially venomous, creepy crawlies are my worst nightmare. When hiking with friends, I feel there’s safety in numbers and thumping footsteps. Being out there alone, fearsome reptiles seem to be a valid concern, making it to the top of my list of trail running fears. It didn’t help that in the pre-race orientation we had been warned numerous times to “leave snakes alone & give them a wide berth.”

  2. Getting lost. Sadly, I have no sense of direction. My siblings have always had a great sense of direction. I think the sense of direction gene skipped me. The family joke is that I’d get lost in my own back yard (which is tiny.) I usually don’t have the slightest idea where I am heading. In big road races, there are plenty of people around for me to follow, and the courses are typically well marked. Trail runs can be hit-or-miss. The idea of taking a wrong turn and being lost in the wilderness hopelessly wandering in circles was truly terrifying.

  3. Wild horses. New territory, new fear. Again, I’ve hiked in many areas where there are bears or other dangerous animals. Hiking in a group prevents wildlife encounters. It was a deliberate choice to race to the breathtaking high-desert landscape where the magnificent wild horses can be seen running free. Yet, on race day, fear creeped in. Horses can be dangerous. What if a mustang knocked me down and stepped on me?


At the starting line, I had to remind myself that to fear is human, but my aspiration is to always find and ride my growth edge. I have to dare myself to face small fears so that I can then face big ones. For me, the way to manage my fears was to look around me and choose to see the beauty of the landscape, immerse myself in it and savor it. With every breath, I started to feel more beauty than fear. Facing my fear of wild things in an unfamiliar territory mysteriously heightened my sense of beauty. Underneath the fear, lies great freedom. Like the wild horses, I was free to roam free, to fly down the trail tearing down the emotional barriers. I became fierce.


It brought back memories of reading “Where the Wild Things Are” with my children and taking them to play at “The Wild Things Are Here” at the San Francisco Metreon Center. Maurice Sendak’s message still rings true many years later – fear isn’t an enemy. It is a powerful motivator that gets all the senses firing and can be a vehicle for growth. When we turn our fears into fuel, we thrive. I knew that to run with joy, I’d have to respect my fears but change my perception. When in fear, I use the 3 Rs: Recognize, Reframe & Release to raise my resilience and propel me toward my goal. Here’s how:


Recognize the Voice of Fear & Discern False Evidence

Learn how to recognize fear right away and to effectively “metabolize” its inherent power to turn it into a vitalizing energy. It starts with quiet reflection to allow the brain to process enough information beyond the initial alert system triggering a false alarm. Ask yourself, “why am I experiencing this?” You realize soon enough that you are safe. Remember, fear is just a feeling. The most effective strategy when noticing the feeling of fear is to take that first small step in spite of it.


I had to remind myself that while I do have the tendency to get lost, I always find my way back. I am strong and capable and have great resources at my disposal. I had my phone and Google maps. If I missed a turn, I would be OK. Positive affirmatios negate the fears and help us navigate our way forward. Whatever challenges you face in your career, there are just as many resources available to help you pull through.


Reframe your Mindset & Restore your Perspective

Our emotions stem from our thoughts, which may or may not be accurate. Check your thoughts. Reflect on what pushed the “start” button on your emotional response. Now make the shift to a better response. Ask yourself, “what are effective ways to deal with this situation?” Change your perspective and apply useful tools and strategies gained through other life experiences.


I had to remind myself that horses are not predators and aren’t out there to get me, and that snakes want nothing to do with humans. When left alone, they pose no threat to me. They will not track me down to bite me. Cognitive reframing can help you overcome career obstacles. Reframe threats as challenges, and challenges as opportunities. Seeing opportunities is a trigger to elevate curiosity, which will allow you to problem-solve and create solutions.


Release Expectations & Engage with your Surroundings to Stay Grounded

Release your fears by focusing on the next step. Then take that step. Do that again. And again. And again. And until the magic happens, and you’ve made it through the challenge. In addition to releasing your fears through movement, be sure to release and replace your expectations. The Zen tradition offers the concept of “beginner’s mind.” Coming into the new experience with an empty cup, being ready to receive, to see what is directly in front of us without interjecting our ego, biases, and fears. Allow yourself to fully engage with the newness of things to let things unfold naturally.


Being a grounded runner means neither underestimating nor overemphasizing the challenge. A good (career) run requires being prepared, being aware, and being engaged.


Always be prepared: increase your knowledge. Build and hone your skills. Understand what is required to achieve your goal and set a clear plan. Think about the journey instead of the end destination.


Always be aware: maintain high alert to observe and notice what’s around you. Open your eyes and ears and proactively take it all in. Collect the data and remain well-informed and up-to-date.


Engage appropriately: to achieve goals, being an observer isn’t enough. You need to actively process new information and respond accordingly. Be engaged but not uptight. You don’t want to be over-engaged to the point of being nervous and rigid, or disengaged to the point of missing critical information. Find the fluidity to negotiate obstacles and go with the flow as things unfold.


On the run and along the career journey, having fear is normal. The key differentiator to your success is how well you deal with the discomfort. There may be 100 reasons to not try, but you need to look for the one good reason to fiercely pursue what you truly want. The key takeaway to gain success on the run and in life is to think of it as an adventure, an opportunity to explore. Shift your mindset from fear to fierce and set the intention to be open to new experiences – open eyes, open mind, and open heart.




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